Wednesday, October 26, 2011

News no one cares about "Boy wants to be a girl scout"

His dark eyes stared back at him from the mirror reflecting an image that he didn’t know.  The cub scout patches itched against his bare skin, his long black hair tucked under a baseball cap.  His father’s words echoed in his head. “Climb trees, learn to start fires and survive, don’t you want to be a boy scout Bobby?”  These things held no interest for him, he wanted to play with dolls, paint his nails and most of all sell those delicious girl scout cookies.  Two years ago when Bobby Montoya first tasted the pure decadence of a caramel somoa he knew his life would never be complete until he joined the cryptic society which controlled the underground cookie trade.  If he was to succeed he would have to immerse himself in their culture.  First he grew his hair into the flowing black veil that now fell over his eyes.  Next he needed to act as they did, so dolls and fairies became second nature.  Daily he’d put on his pink warm ups and flash dance to “it’s raining men.”  But something strange happened and somewhere along the line it became more than a quest for cookies.  Bobby had found himself.  Liberated from the chains of being a boy Bobby was now free to express himself in ways he never knew.  Skirts and princess costumes and most of all joining troop number 5 of the Girl Scouts of Colorado. 
“Bobby you’re a boy,” the troop leader said with a stern and puzzled face.  Confused Bobby looked to his mother and sparkling tears began to flow down his cheeks.  Furiously she stood to her feet almost knocking over the desk.  “Bobby’s as much a girl as you or I, you have no right.”
  The troop leader simply shook her head and chose her next words carefully.  “Mam you have a son, he’s got boy parts and this is called GIRL scouts of Colorado.”  Bobby continued to sob and collapsed onto the floor.  His mother just stood bewildered trying to make sense of the strange words being spoken to her. 
Seriously people have we come to this.  I fault Chaz Bono for convincing everyone to call her a him and now here we are.  Honestly what’s to stop a 16 year old from saying he needs to shower with the girls because he feels like he is one of them.  This really gives incentive to join the girls volleyball team.   

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